Find Yourself
I've always said in order to understand people, you need to know yourself pretty well. Relationships are the same. Especially Dom/Sub relationships. Its hard to be intuitive when you lack understanding of yourself. It's also really hard to be open about things when you don't even understand them. This is true for both dominates and submissives.
For a submissive, it is very important to be able to explain how you feel, and also what your needs are. If you don't understand them, it is really hard to share that with your Dom. Many submissives lack this understanding of themselves. Very much so early in their submissive journey. That is why they gravitate towards leadership. It takes an extremely intuitive Dom to help a sub through this journey. Because it takes patience, understanding, empathy and extremely good listening skills. And its not always verbal cues you're looking for. You need to be able to read your submissive rather she's telling you something, or responding in other ways. Body language, eyes, breathing, and general behavior are the best clues to pay attention to.
For Doms, this is a whole other experience. As being the guidance in your relationship, you'll feel left to find out on your own at times. If you're in a lengthy Dom/Sub relationship, your partner may help you explore and find better understanding of yourself. For the most natural dominates, this will not be a struggle. They generally have enough experience to understand their own emotions and needs. But the Dom that struggles could easily wreck a relationship by not having control of owns emotions and desires. You can't control a Sub if you can't control yourself.
So, what is it that you need to know, understand, and be able to convey? Generally your emotions, but also your desires and needs. Both need to have a good understanding of their emotional needs. This determines topics as big as having an open relationship or being exclusive. But also needing to know what you need in your interactions between each other. While Subs are known for their needs, that's why they gravitate to a Dom. Because they need guidance, protection, leadership, and generally a lot of attention. But Doms have needs as well. The submissive needs to know those needs.
A good Sub motivates their Dom to grow. Having communication between the two is what helps them grow. But that conversation is difficult if you don't know your needs before hand. There are also physical needs that you should discuss. This usually becomes clearer with experience. Sometimes that experience is self exploration. Yes. That means masturbation even. It's the easiest way to know what drives you wild. And its great if you can convey this with your partner. No one wants to lay there during sex thinking to ones self, well this sucks.
I recommend experimenting. What feels good to you? What turns you on? What turns you off? What gets you hard or wet? And don't be afraid to have those conversations once you know. It leads to the best sexual encounters you can have. Nothing is hotter than knowing what drives each other crazy and sexually torturing each other.
Take the time to know what you want in your relationship. So you and your partner know what works and what doesn't. Be open, discuss with one another, and explore. Once you know yourself. Its sharing, discovering, and finding the best ways to please one another. This understanding of ones self, sharing with each other, and exploring together on your journey is what will make the relationship the strongest and the hottest possible.
For a submissive, it is very important to be able to explain how you feel, and also what your needs are. If you don't understand them, it is really hard to share that with your Dom. Many submissives lack this understanding of themselves. Very much so early in their submissive journey. That is why they gravitate towards leadership. It takes an extremely intuitive Dom to help a sub through this journey. Because it takes patience, understanding, empathy and extremely good listening skills. And its not always verbal cues you're looking for. You need to be able to read your submissive rather she's telling you something, or responding in other ways. Body language, eyes, breathing, and general behavior are the best clues to pay attention to.
For Doms, this is a whole other experience. As being the guidance in your relationship, you'll feel left to find out on your own at times. If you're in a lengthy Dom/Sub relationship, your partner may help you explore and find better understanding of yourself. For the most natural dominates, this will not be a struggle. They generally have enough experience to understand their own emotions and needs. But the Dom that struggles could easily wreck a relationship by not having control of owns emotions and desires. You can't control a Sub if you can't control yourself.
So, what is it that you need to know, understand, and be able to convey? Generally your emotions, but also your desires and needs. Both need to have a good understanding of their emotional needs. This determines topics as big as having an open relationship or being exclusive. But also needing to know what you need in your interactions between each other. While Subs are known for their needs, that's why they gravitate to a Dom. Because they need guidance, protection, leadership, and generally a lot of attention. But Doms have needs as well. The submissive needs to know those needs.
A good Sub motivates their Dom to grow. Having communication between the two is what helps them grow. But that conversation is difficult if you don't know your needs before hand. There are also physical needs that you should discuss. This usually becomes clearer with experience. Sometimes that experience is self exploration. Yes. That means masturbation even. It's the easiest way to know what drives you wild. And its great if you can convey this with your partner. No one wants to lay there during sex thinking to ones self, well this sucks.
I recommend experimenting. What feels good to you? What turns you on? What turns you off? What gets you hard or wet? And don't be afraid to have those conversations once you know. It leads to the best sexual encounters you can have. Nothing is hotter than knowing what drives each other crazy and sexually torturing each other.
Take the time to know what you want in your relationship. So you and your partner know what works and what doesn't. Be open, discuss with one another, and explore. Once you know yourself. Its sharing, discovering, and finding the best ways to please one another. This understanding of ones self, sharing with each other, and exploring together on your journey is what will make the relationship the strongest and the hottest possible.
Spot on daddy.
ReplyDelete